Held Hostage 1995 Content
12" x 12" image from the 1994 America Held Hostage calendar is
suitable for framing.
COULD HAVE BEEN GURNSEY GAMBLER OR BOVINE BETTER
The dopes this unelected
meddler has roped are those who believe her several explanations
about how she made $100,000 in cattle futures during Ronald Reagan's
heartless and greedy eighties.Because cattle future were on a steep
and sustained climb during the nine months Rodham was in the market,
she and her defenders like to say that her unparalleled success
was the result of both savvy and lucky timing. But the bulk of that
$100,000 was made in seemingly prescient bets against the market's
steady ascent that match the occasional momentary downturns.
Island spoof was triggered by a report in Time Magazine of
President Clinton's reacton to a Lego model of the White House presented
to him in the Oval Office: "Secretary [Robert] Reich could
almost live in there" (the labor secretary happened to be four
feet and eight inches tall). For Clinton's insensitive remark, and
for this politically incorrect illustration, Bodewell offers the
Eddie Murphy approach to correctness in humor: "The reason
I make fun of homosexuals," said Murphy, "is . . . 'cause
they be homosexuals."
will recognize the phrase "symbolism over substance."
The most revolting example of this phenomenon was a real-life instance
from Bill Clinton's D-Day memorial trip to England and France during
which he was videotaped among rows of United Sates Servicemen's
graves stooping to replant miniature American flags that had been
uprooted by the president's advance team to set the stage for a
poignant photo opportunitiy. Bodewell is not veteran, but this manipulative
sham made him want to hurl.
original calendar notes read prophetically: "Dark deeds sometimes
lead to turbulent times. The Clinton's negotiated some eddies and
swirls during Special Counsel Robert Fiske's aborted investigation.
But the newly appointed Independent Counsel, Kenneth Starr, and
Republican House and Senate majorities suggest that more roiling
rapids and submerged objects may await the First Rafters downstream.
Given the mutual fawning
between certain moving image media moguls and the Clintons, and
given Clinton's personal family values record, it was going to
be either Roseanne for Culture Czar or Madonna for Special Advisor
to the President on Family Values.
Rostenkowski not only look so right in the role of the heavy (he'd
cast perfectly for the part of a union boss), but since his lack
of sense was exhibited by his abuse of the House of Representatives
Post Office privileges, he was the obvious choice to inaugurate
what could become a series of "No Cents" stamps. Many
other candidates leap to mind.
titled illustration (should be "I'd feel naked") was
based on a Bulova watch advertisement that featured super model
Kathy Ireland wearing only a time piece on her comely wrist. During
the Clinton administrations desperate push to get congress to
pass Hillary's Universal Health Care proposal, it had occurred
to the artist that perhaps the champions of the plan might have
had more success promoting it with their bodies than on its merits.
But after sketching a prototype, it began to sink in that the
Bulova ad worked because Ireland is beautiful and the watch is
(NOT SUITABLE FOR FRAMING!)
the movie, featured a good man thrust into an unlikely position
who rose to the occasion. The problem with "Bill" is
not that it is rated "R," or how much Bill resembles
the individual who, in the movie, Dave replaced. The problem with
Bill is that it is not a movie and that it has a four-year engagement.
"Clapner" [she was talking about Clapton] fan was scary
because her occupation of the office of Surgeon General of the
United States demonstrated either how much foolishness Bill Clinton
would abide to make his appointees look like America, or that,
like Jocelyn Elders, Clinton approved of drug legalization and
the distribution of condoms to elementary school children.
Bill Clinton shook hands with John F. Kennedy in 1963. That meeting,
after which the ambitious youth determined one day to occupy the
White House, was what Newsweek termed a "defining
moment." Although Clinton visited Moscow a few years later,
he did not meet the man who had pounded the United Nations General
Assembly lectern with his shoe, boasting how he would bury us.
But Clinton's socio-economic policies, resembling more those of
Nikita Krushchev than Kennedy, might well intern the nation, were
they permitted to pass. (That is a young Hillary Rodham in the
the 19987 vice presidential debates, a sneering Lloyd Bentson
told Dan Qualyle, "I knew Jack Kennedy; your're no Jack Kennedy."
From 1960 to 1962, Kennedy had a series of extramarital trysts
with a stunning brunette named Judith Exner who had social ties
to a couple of Mafia bosses who were linked to the CIA's botched
assassination attempt on Fidel Castro. Because Bill Clinton likes
to think of his presidency as Camelot revisited, Bodewell thought
it fun to contrast Kennedy's Camelot with Clinton's Care-A-Lot
. Here an ageless Exner is exiting the White House in 1995, when then ABC Whitehouse
correspondent Brit Hume asked the question.
nightmare: "I dreamt I was suffering through a Limbaugh segment
in which he was advising a caller about choosing cigars by ring
size, when (crazy things happen in dreams) Hillary Rodham appeared
and yanked the cigar from Rush's mouth. He went poof, and she
sat down to smoke his cigar her Oval Office. From this nightmare
I awoke, before she could mandate Universal Health Care coverage,
and, unfortunately, before Connie Chung could appear as a cigar